


To Me, You Are (What I've Always Wanted)

by lavenderlotion



Series: all of you, loves all of me [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Acceptance, Bad Friend Scott McCall (Teen Wolf), Come Eating, F/M, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff, Getting Together, Hand Jobs, Making Out, Snowballing, Trans Allison Argent, Trans Female Character, Transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 05:59:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18492814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavenderlotion/pseuds/lavenderlotion
Summary: “You aren’t upset?”“Babe, my hot as hellgirlfriendis sitting in my lap. Why would I be upset about anything right now?”Allison blushes. Her cheeks go warm even as a pleased little smile slips onto her lips. When she leans back down, Stiles meets her excitedly, and after a moment of languid kissing she shuffles forward, rollings her hips so that they’re completely pressed together, the friction making them both gasp.





	To Me, You Are (What I've Always Wanted)

**Author's Note:**

> This idea had been in my head _forever_ , holy shit. It is loosely inspired by a wip I have, a story that is shaping up to be a looooong, multi-part series that I am so, so excited for. I got this out in about three hours, and it seriously just flowed out. I hope you liked it!
> 
> beta'd by the amazing [AuguriesofInnocence](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AuguriesofInnocence)!

Allison is panting, her breath being stolen by Stiles’ lips, her heartbeat matching the erratic beat that his fingers are tapping out on her thighs where they’re stretched over his. Her knees are sinking into the couch, forcing their bodies together, not allowing any space between them, and it causes panic to ebb up. 

This is the first time they’ve done this. It’s not the first time they’ve made out—there have been a few instances in the Jeep and against bedroom doors and hidden away between classes—but Allison has never  before  sat in Stiles’ lap. When she crawled onto it tonight, she hadn’t realized it would put their crotches so close together. She blames the wide span of Stiles’ fingers and how his hands feel against her hips for not thinking of what their position would mean. 

Until now, she’s been careful to keep their hips from touching too much. Stiles has never seemed to mind—hell, he  hasn’t done  _ anything _ to make her feel rushed in any way—and he has always backed off when she became uncomfortable. Allison had  clearly been distracted when she swung a leg over both of Stiles’, sitting on his lap without breaking their kiss and tangling her fingers in his hair.

Now, she pulls off, her own arousal making her feel like she ’s going to cry as guilt eats her up and makes her eyes water. She takes a deep, steadying breath and rests their foreheads together, keeping her eyes closed so she doesn’t have to see him.

“You—you know I haven’t had surgery, right?” Allison tells him, fear racing up her belly as guilt makes her throat too tight to swallow. She should have told him sooner, should have told him as soon as he invited her over and asked her to stay the night. 

Stiles blinks up at her, his eyes  unfocused, hazy and glassy, his own breath coming in quick, short bursts. A little bead of pride climbs up her stomach at having put that look  there, though she’s too worried to focus on it. 

“Nope,” Stiles says, popping the ‘p’, and then he’s leaning back up even as Allison tries to scramble away, thoughts racing faster than her heartbeat, and thinking _you_ _should have told him, why didn’t you, so stupid he_ _’s never going to_ _want you, that’s so unfair, you led him on and now he_ _’s going to_ _ask you to leave,_ _you should_ _have known_ _—_ “Where’re you going?” Stiles asks, his brows pulling down in confusion. His hold on her thighs tightens, keeping her in his lap and not letting her move away. 

“I—” the words get trapped up in her throat,  _ terror _ forcing her teeth to clank together as her mouth shuts. She doesn’t know what to say, what to do. 

“Hey, Ally,” his words are whisper soft and so, so gentle that a sob bubbles up from her chest. His hands, when they tuck her hair behind her ears and trace over her cheeks, are gentler. “It’s okay. It’s totally , 100%, a-okay.”

“But I, I didn’t tell you—”

“I mean.. . I guess I sort of assumed? Just because, like, you’re still seventeen and I’m not even sure they would do that yet,” Stiles explains, his hands rubbing  soothingly  up and down her thighs. She’s still on his lap, but they  aren’t pressed up together like they were. 

“You  aren’t upset ?”

“Babe, my hot as hell  _ girlfriend _ is sitting in my lap. Why would I  be upset about anything right now?”

Allison blushes. Her cheeks go warm even as a pleased little smile slips onto her lips. When she leans back down, Stiles meets her excitedly , and after a moment of languid kissing she shuffles forward, rollings her hips so  that  they’re  completely  pressed together, the friction making them both gasp. 

* * *

“Hey! Hey, Allison, wait up!” Stiles’ voice echoed around the parking lot, and Allison turned back in time to catch him running up to her. His face was red, bright and splotchy in a way that made her heart flutter, and his eyes were wide. “I,  uhm , was wondering if,  _ shit _ if.. .uh , if I could walk you to your car?”

Allison looked down the parking lot to where her car  was parked only four spots away, then back to Stiles’ smile— boyishly  hopeful and  very pretty . She agreed with a nod of her head, letting her hair fall in front of her face to hide her own, answering grin. 

They’d only walked a few, short steps before Stiles let out a whistling breath through his teeth. 

“So.. . I had  _ a lot _ of fun tonight,” Stiles told her, his words far more serious than they needed to be.

“I did too,” she said, her own cheeks getting warm. It wasn’t a lie, it wasn’t even _close_ to a lie, actually. Allison had an _amazing_ time, even if the night hadn’t been anything like she’d been expecting. 

Hell, Allison hadn’t even wanted to  _ go _ bowling tonight, not after.. . not after the text messages from Scott had stopped, her own turning green as soon as she sent them. She’d had boys block her number before, so she knew what it looked like when it happened. 

The last thing she had wanted to do was go out, but Lydia had shown up at her front door and had  _ somehow _ gotten past her hovering father and into her room. She had taken one look at her, studying the mascara-tracked cheeks and the puffy eyes, and opened her arms without even knowing what was wrong. 

Allison blubbered out an explanation into Lydia’s shoulder and the girl had done nothing more than hold her even tighter. When she  finally  pulled away, she had dabbed Allison’s wet cheeks and told her, no room in her tone to argue, that they were going out and they  were going to have fun. 

Allison had  had no idea what to expect when they pulled up in Jackson’s Porsche, but Stiles’ blue Jeep hadn’t been it. His posture had been stiff and his voice had  been hesitant when he asked if they still wanted his company since Scott couldn’t make it. Lydia had shrugged, Jackson had scoffed, and Allison had offered him a small smile. 

Now, hours later, Allison could  honestly  say she had an  _ amazing _ time, even if the sting of Scott’s rejection was still strong. She focused back on Stiles, and she noticed that he was rubbing his hands together as he bounced on the balls of his feet, mumbling under his breath as he seemed to work himself up. Allison remained silent as she tried not to let dread pool up in her stomach. 

“ Uhm .. . so Scott kinda told me what you told him? And.. . fuck, I’m  really  sorry, Ally, but I think he may have told other people too? I told him not to, I swear, and if he spread it around, I ’m  _ totally _ going to kick his ass, really —”

“You don’t have to do that,” she jumped in, because he  _ didn’t.  _ She.. . she didn’t blame Scott, not really . It hurt, it  _ always hurts _ , but she didn’t blame him (though  _ fuck him _ for blocking her, that dick).

“Right. Well. Uhm, I wanted to ask if you, if maybe...and I had wanted to at first, too, really, but then Scott had swooped in and you guys were talking _all the time_ , and you’re _way_ outta my league, anyway, so why would I even try, b-but I—” Allison giggled as Stiles tripped over his words, and his already flushed face darkened. “ _Ohmygod_ , could you please stop being so freaking _adorable_? I’m trying to ask you out!”

Allison laughed outright, giddy, her smile pulling at her cheeks until they hurt. She nodded and made a little go-on gesture. “So. Yeah. Date. With me? Would want to go out? Sometime? With me. On a date. In a date-like capacity?”

Allison laughed again, her heart feeling so full it felt like her chest  was going to split open, and she stepped forward, Stiles’ voice dying out as soon as she was in his space. He was  pleasantly  taller than her, tall enough  that  she had to look up at him to meet his eyes, and his eyes looked gold in the parking lot lighting. 

“Yes, Stiles, we can go on a  _ second _ date, but only if you end this one with a kiss,” she had dared to say,  completely  breathless, and Stiles’ eyes had gone wide, his mouth dropping open.

There had been a moment, one long, terrifying moment, when Stiles had done nothing, but then he had stepped forward and his lips had  been so sweet against hers that nothing else had mattered.

* * *

Allison rolls her hips down again, her dick dragging against Stiles’ stomach as her ass rolls against the hard line of his cock. It feels so good, so much better than she could have ever thought, and it’s all heightened by having Stiles’ tongue in her mouth. She can  hardly  believe  that  this is  happening, that Stiles  _ wants _ this to happen.

He is so hard under her, and he’s making the same punched-out moans  that  she is, only an octave  or so  deeper and sounding sexier than any porn Allison has ever watched. She keeps licking into his mouth, their tongues  lazily  swiping against one another. Tension is building in her belly, and her entire body is  overly  warm, only spurred on by Stiles’ own body heat. 

“Do you—do you  wanna go upstairs?” Stiles pulls away to ask, dragging her bottom lip out with his teeth, nibbling on the flesh before letting go. Allison whines and nods, not able to find her voice. 

When she stands, her knees  are shaky . She almost falls, but then Stiles is there, big hands holding her hips and pulling their bodies flush, once again dragging their hips together. “Fuck,” he swears, panting open-mouthed against her forehead. “Jesus, this feels so fucking good.”

Allison makes a little high-pitched noise of  agreement . She’s a little surprised that she’s still hard (things haven’t worked quite like they’re supposed to since she started hormones) but she is  _ not _ complaining. She’s never been this aroused in her  _ life _ , that she can be sure of, and Stiles  is warm and solid under her hands. 

“Upstairs?” she asks, because as good as this is she wants,  _ needs _ , more. 

Stiles nods against her mouth, hands sliding around to hold in her a hug for a long minute. It’s a chance for them to breathe, and Allison  gladly  takes the moment he’s offering. She calms down, a little, her arousal turning into a low burning heat instead of the forest fire  that  it had been, and she can breathe, taking breaths that fill her chest nicely . 

“Sorry,” Stiles says, pulling back. He doesn’t meet her eyes as he says, “I,  uh , almost came.”

She groans again, pulling back so she can press in for another heated kiss. The knowledge goes straight to her dick and makes it twitch, and she moans  loudly  when a spurt of  precome leaks out of her. “Upstairs,” she begs, pulling Stiles with her as she walks backwards, “Upstairs, Stiles,  c’mon .”

He lets her, trailing after her  dutifully  when she turns around. Allison skips up the steps, laughing  loudly  when Stiles grabs a handful of her ass. His hand is so big that a thousand thoughts rush into her head at once, leaving her so dizzy with arousal  that  she has to stop. Stiles climbs onto the step with her, feet on either side of hers, and he presses so  tightly  against her back  that  it feels like he’s trying to force them into one. 

He bites into her shoulder, so  suddenly  that she cries out, and his hands wrap around her to hold her in place while he worries the spot with his teeth, sucking on the skin. His pressure falters, and she knows this is a first for them both. That this is  _ all _ a first for them both. 

Finally , he pulls off, mumbling a “fuck yeah” under his breath that makes her laugh. She knows  that  she must have a bruise, and the knowledge only turns her on more, pushing her to  finally  continue up the stairs. As soon as Stiles steps into his bedroom after her, she backs him against the door, closing it by pressing him into it. 

They kiss, more, hips pressed together in a way that’s becoming mind- numbingly  familiar, but is still  _ so good _ . 

“Can I undress you?” he asks seriously , and the question sounds like more than it is. 

She nods all the same, letting Stiles crowd close and kiss her sweetly . His fingers are shaking as they toy with the hem of her shirt, and Allison runs a hand down his buzzed scalp  in hopes of calming him. His fingers don’t stop shaking, but he  does pull her shirt over her head. Stiles’ sharp intake of breath is flattering, and she doesn’t feel insecure—at least not yet.

Her  bralette is lacy and pink, something she had bought on a whim, and Stiles’ fingers trace the edges of the lace gently . Her breasts aren’t big, but they’re big considering she used to have nothing there, and Stiles’ hands cup them nicely . Slowly , he slips the fabric off, leaving her chest bare to his hungry eyes. 

When his mouth closes over her nipple, she gasps, arching back into his mouth. Her hands come up to grab onto his head, wondering when he even  _ moved _ to begin with. She has enough mind to grab  _ his _ shirt, rucking it over his head and then getting lost in staring. Stiles’ stomach is soft, a line of dark hair trailing out of his jeans. The hard line of his dick is very obvious now, and her mouth waters with want. 

Her fingers fumble on his belt buckle. 

“Is this okay?” he asks, breathless, and Allison nods before taking off both of their pants. 

* * *

Because their first date had been on a Friday, Allison hadn’t had to deal with anything for an entire weekend. The next morning Stiles had shown up with a small, cheap looking  bouquet of flowers that  he had apologized for even as Allison had trimmed the stems and put them in a vase. Her dad had looked at them with a raised brow but a happy frown, and he had said nothing more than “ be safe ” when they left the house.

Stiles had taken her to his favourite arcade, and then a diner for lunch, and then back to his house where they watched a movie on the couch, holding hands the entire time. It had been one of the best days of Allison’s life, and she smiled during the entire adventure. Stiles walked to her front door after driving her home, and he had slowly , so slowly , backed her up against the side of her house and kissed her softly , and then harder, exploring her mouth. 

She had only pulled away because she had gotten hard, and she had thanked everything holy that her shirt was long enough to cover her crotch as she pulled back with a few more  soft, sweet kisses pressed against her lips. 

They had texted until it was no longer Saturday and instead early Sunday, before Allison passed out. She had woken up to half a dozen sweet goodnight texts that she screenshotted, if only to prove to herself that she had really received them. An hour or so later, Stiles had called her, in answer to the good morning text she sent, and they talked for three hours until Chris called her down for dinner. Once Allison was finished eating she was back on her phone, and they texted for another few hours before she forced herself to go to sleep.

She had woken up to more cute good morning texts, rolling onto her stomach and hiding her face in her pillows as she squealed stupidly . She got dressed in a haze, picking out clothes  that  she knew looked good, just so she could see how Stiles would look at her. Allison thought of nothing but Stiles on the drive to school, knowing  that  she was being ridiculous but not at all caring. 

It wasn’t until Allison walked through the front doors that everything that happened on Friday came back to her. Stiles words echoed in her mind,  _ but I think he may have told other people too _ running over and over in her head as people  _ stared _ , their eyes following her as she walked down the hall. 

Stiles was already waiting at her locker, and she only had a moment of hesitation until she walked into the hug he offered her. She felt ridiculous when she  started to cry , silently , but she couldn't help it. It was all too familiar, the hushed whispering and the mean stares. She couldn't handle an environment like her old school, not after  finally  getting out. 

“Are you okay?” he asked into her hair, and Allison shook her head even as her eyes burned. 

He hugged her tighter, rubbing her back, and he turned them so  she was pressed into the lockers and he was shielding her from the hall. Allison tangled her fingers into Stiles’ shirt, not wanting to let go. They stood like that, quietly , as the hall whispered around them and Allison tried to ignore the cruel sound of gossip.

“Stilinski!” Jackson called, and Allison pulled back just enough  that  she could see Jackson storm down the hall. He stopped in  front of them , his face angry. “Stilinski, why the fuck would McCall  do that?” Jackson growled, and Allison felt a surge of affection for the jock when she realized he was angry on her behalf. 

“What do you mean?” Stiles asked, pulling back a little more but keeping Allison tucked close with an arm around her waist. It made Allison feel a little  better, even though her frown deepened at the tone in Stiles’ voice. 

“What the fuck do you mean what do I mean? He  fucking told like,  _ everyone _ dude!”

Allison had watched, wide-eyed, as Stiles’ face went red and his eyes went angry in a way that Allison had never  before  seen. Knowing  that  the anger  wasn’t directed at her was the only thing that kept her from  being afraid , and she held her breath when Stiles turned to her. His eyes softened, just a little, and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. 

“If you’d excuse me,  m’lady , I’ve got a dick bag to talk to.”

Stiles didn’t wait for either of them to answer. He untangled himself from Allison, carefully , before he stalked off, his shoulders squared and his hands clenched into fists by his sides. Allison  had no idea what was about to happen, and fear bubbled up in her stomach. She turned to Jackson to find the jock watching her, a soft look on her face  that  she hadn’t seen before. 

“Should we go after him?” Allison asked, her eyes still wide as she stared after his retreating back . 

Jackson sighed, loudly , but said, “ Probably . Last time something like this happened.. . Stiles was been a freshman and the other guy a senior. It—it didn’t end well, for the senior.” and followed Allison when she took off after Stiles. 

When she rounded the corner that Stiles had disappeared around, she saw Scott backed up against his locker, hands held up in front of him. Stiles was talking to him quietly , his face twisted into something angry and unpleasant. They edged closer, ignoring the growing crowd of students and walking forward until Allison could hear what they were saying. 

“Scott, bro, what the  _ fuck _ ?” Stiles’ voice raised into a question. His hands shook at his sides. 

“Stiles, huh—”

“What the fuck did you do? How the hell could you tell people what Allison told you? Fuck Scott, I even told you  _ not to _ !”

“Dude, it’s not my fault he’s a—

“Don’t you dare call my girlfriend a guy, you fucking dick,” Stiles said, his voice dropping in volume but sounding no less threatening. A hand tangled with her own and she turned to find Lydia there, offering her support. 

“Y-your  _ girlfriend _ ? Dude, that’s a  _ dude _ , you know  that ri —” Scott didn’t get to finish, because  suddenly  Stiles’ first had hit his face, knuckles connecting with his jaw and sending Scott’s head flying to the side. His whole body followed, pushed back into the lockers with the force of Stiles’ right hook. 

“Don’t you dare call my girlfriend a guy, you  _ fucking dick _ ,” he repeated, his tone final.

Then he was in front of her, bloodied knuckles right in front of her eyes as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry, Ally. Do you want me to take you home?” 

She nodded, unable to find her voice. Allison let Stiles twine their fingers together, following him out into the parking lot. She  didn’t say anything , but when they got to the  Jeep she pulled Stiles close and held him so  tightly  it almost hurt, for so long that by the time she pulled away her arms were numb. 

“Thank you,” she said, feeling silly for crying but not being able to stop. Stiles shrugged, so she kissed him and kissed him. 

* * *

She has to bite down a wave of insecurity, feeling open and  vulnerable and exposed , when she is  suddenly  bare. Her dick is hairless and very hard, flushed red at the tip and sticking straight up, just under her belly button. She focuses on looking at him: his dick is longer and thicker than hers, not that she minds, and  is surrounded by a patch of dark, curly hairs. The head is wet with  precome , more than Allison has ever produced, and he’s circumcised.

She likes it. 

“Oh, you’re not cut,” Stiles says, his brows furrowing together. “That is  _ so _ fucking hot.”

Allison’s mind screeches to a halt, and she asks, “What?”

“Is it weird to say your penis is pretty? I don’t mean it anyway at all, I swear, it  just  _ is _ . Like, look at it?” Stiles rambles, hands making aborted motions before she  finally  steps closer. Her cock bobs, hitting the crease of Stiles’ hip, and she groans when her head drags along Stiles’ skin. “ _ Fuck _ ,  _ oh my god _ .”

Stiles pushes her onto the bed, and she laughs, bouncing, before her voice cuts off into a dirty moan when Stiles drops to his knees. He hits the carpet hard enough  that  she winces, but he doesn't seem phased  _ at all _ . She doesn’t feel great, all of her insecurities bubbling together in her stomach, but Stiles is staring at her with eyes darker than she has ever seen, his mouth dropped open. 

“I’ve never sucked a dick before, but I’ve also  never eaten anyone out, and sucking dick kind of seems easier? Since, like, I have one too, ya know?” he says, and while it might be the obvious continuation of him dropping to her knees, she still feels like she’s being left behind. 

“ Wha —”

“Do you have  _ any _ idea how much I want to go down on you? It’s been like, my top jerk-off material since we went bowling,” Stiles tells her with a grin that makes her throb. When he sees it happen, his grin gets wider. 

“But—”

“The mechanics  are gonna be  a bit  different, yeah, but I still  wanna make you come on my tongue. Or, like in my mouth? What’s the equivalent for a penis?”

Allison moans, picturing  exactly  that—Stiles mouth wrapped around her dick, his lips flushed and swollen as he swallows her down. She groans again, rolling her hips forward into  _ nothing _ . Stiles’ hands travel up her thighs, pushing her legs apart so he can shuffle closer. Her calves press against his torso, and he doesn’t stop until he’s right there in between her legs.

She leans down to kiss him, unable to stop herself, and gets lost in the kiss. Eventually , though, Stiles pulls off with an impatient sounding noise

“So can I blow you?” he asks, but then he goes silent as his eyes widen. “Oh my god, do you want me to say eat you out? Would that be better?”

“No,” Allison gasps, rolling her hips upwards again, just the  _ thought _ of him doing that making her ass clench around nothing. “No, only say eat me out if you’re eating me out.”

“Holy fuck I can do that? You’ll let me do that?” Stiles asks, sounding for all intentions like an overeager puppy, or a kid on Christmas. Allison laughs, breathless, when Stiles wraps a hand around her length. 

When he closes his mouth around the head, Allison is  pretty  sure she dies, a little. The wet heat of his mouth feels better than anything she has ever felt in her entire life, and she makes a choked, gurgling sort of noise  that  she would  be embarrassed by if her entire world wasn’t Stiles’ mouth on her dick. 

She  has no idea if he’s doing good— really , he  probably  isn’t—but it feels so good she doesn’t care. His teeth scrape, occasionally , but she  softly  reminds him to cover them every time it happens. He  starts going faster, his hand pumping the base of her dick as he bobs up and down along the top half, flicking out his tongue and digging under her foreskin in a way that has Allison shivering, thighs shaking as pressure builds and builds.

She comes  embarrassingly quickly , not able to do anything more than whine in the back of her throat before she’s coming down Stiles’ throat without warning. Allison watches with wide eyes as a trickle of her come slips past his lips and dribbles down onto his chin, and a moment later she’s sliding off the floor to lick into his mouth. 

He hasn’t swallowed, not completely, so her own come floods her mouth. She moans, scrambling back into his lap as she kisses him, their tongues swiping together messily. Another bead of come spurts from her dick, still hard and aching, but her entire body feels _so good_ that she isn’t even sure what’s going on. She rolls her hips into the crease of his thigh, feeling his own dick press against her stomach. 

She  hardly  touches his dick before he’s coming, shooting warm over her stomach and her hand, soaking her thighs as he comes and comes and comes. The thought makes her groan, and she runs a hand through the mess, rubbing his come into her skin and then into his. Their kiss devolves into nothing more than  sharing of air, both  of them  fucked out as they breathe through their afterglow.

After a while, he pulls back. He  doesn’t say anything at first, staring at her with so much affection it makes her eyes sting. It’s almost too much, but she doesn’t look away. Rather, she stares back, knowing her eyes show much the same. 

“Holy fucking shit you’re the hottest thing  to ever exist ,” Stiles says reverently , his eyes shining seriously . “I am the luckiest guy in the entire world,  _ what even _ .”

Allison laughs, leaning forward for another kiss, and she can’t help  but  feel like she might be the luckiest girl, too. 

**Author's Note:**

> for Wednesday one shots, but on tuesday beacuse i don't wanna do this at 6am tomorrow  
> comments and kudos are much appreciated!  
> come say to me on [my tumblr](https://lavender-lotion.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
